Comfort Zones
Divorce & Parenting Coach
Supervised Visitation Specialist
EMAIL ME
Bio
Hello, my name is Sandy and I am a divorce & parenting coach as well as a supervised visitation specialist. With over 20 years of experience in family law. As a divorce coach specialist is a supportive resource that will help guide people to make smart decisions during a tough time by providing motivational and emotional support. As a matter of fact, I do not provide legal, settlement, or financial advice. We, you and I, as a team, create goals and strategies together to move you through the divorce process with dignity, courage and confidence. The choice to leave a relationship or if the other party made the decision for you, will no doubt be stressful, and this is where I can help. You will be empowered! You will be encouraged! You will be forever changed during this process.
A divorce coach creates a safe and peaceful framework to help people clarify their goals, interests and outcomes pertaining to their divorce. A divorce coach will also work on communication and negotiations skills on how to best interact with a spouse. The goal is to increase collaboration and decrease conflict to reach a mutually agreeable outcome. Divorce coaches also add great value in areas that are normally highly contentious. For example, a divorce coach can help parents resolve visitation and custody issues when children are a part of the divorce.
Many divorce coaches focus on current issues, while others are more specifically geared and trained toward helping a spouse move on after a marriage has ended. Often, a divorce coach will make referrals to other trained professionals who specialize in certain areas where a person needs more help.
I've worked with many attorneys and parents navigating the roller coaster of divorce and found that my ability to listen to your circumstances, explain the process of divorce and mentally prepare you for meetings with counsel, depositions, court appearances or even reconnecting with your children are stressful and can be overwhelming. Your life has or will change drastically and you're on a river in a raft with no oars, but this is where we create oars that will work for you to navigate the water with the unknown river adventure ahead. Not everyone needs the same oars and not all rafts are the same.
My personal experience with divorce could have been better had I used the tools that I have today. Even though I worked in the "family law industry," my very own list of what I wanted, deserved or expected took forever to resolve because my head was not in the right place. I was overwhelmed, angry, frustrated, confused, conflicted and emotional. The experience of actually enduring a separation and divorce is different than assisting clients through the pain. My attorneys were great but instead of working so hard during the battle, I should have been focused on what my soul needed, and that was an understanding ear that wasn't judging me and someone to hold the mirror in front of me to help me to discover the post marriage me one step at a time.
Since moving to Oregon, I have developed a strong reputation with attorneys, mediators and other professionals to allow you the space to develop YOU. This allows the professionals the time needed to perform the tasks of whatever goals you are asking them to do....and YOU get to develop your post-marriage you.
Education
Paralegal Certificate 1989
Christian Heritage College, La Jolla, CA
Monitored Visitation Certificate 2009
Family & Children's Counseling Services, Inc., Sacramento, CA
Relationship Coach Certificate 2012 & 2022
IAP College, Princeton, NJ
Divorce Coach Certificate 2022
IAP College, Princeton, NJ
Skills
• Divorce & Separation
• Parenting Plans and Skills
• Monitored Visitation
• Dating and Post-Processing
As your coach there are 7 core values that are the foundation of my business.
- Build a relationship on the foundation of faith, trust, respect, reliability, communication and integrity.
- Respond to my clients in a timely, fair and approachable manner, because questions need to be answered and the transition can be ever changing.
- Always apply the highest standards of excellence to the quality and management of emotions and actions as we work toward challenges and goals.
- Provide alternate resources when my ability to help you is no longer necessary or beyond my scope of what I am able to do.
- Recognize that success is the result of a long-term perspective.
- Contribute to the community and be good steward of the environment.
- Make a difference and embrace challenge and change...every day.
Do You Need A Divorce Coach?
- Are you in a state of fear more often than not?
- Do you have trouble making decisions?
- Are you depressed about your future after your divorce is final?
- Are you angry and looking for revenge against your spouse?
- Does the legal system intimidate you?
- Do you need someone to bounce ideas off of when it comes to children or assets?
- Are you overwhelmed by potential parenting logistics and co-parenting responsibilities?
What are the benefits of working with a divorce coach?
- A coach will create a safe space. You’ll be able to have an open and honest discussion about specific issues that are bothering you. You will also get relief by sharing your concerns and dealing with facts instead of imagined problems.
- The focus is on you. You’ll get support to deal with your issues, problems, challenges and desired outcomes. Aligning your goals and values will be a big part of what a divorce coach can do for you.
- You will have a shoulder to lean on which can be a huge benefit if your divorce came as a shock to you.
- As your divorce coach, I am somebody you can trust to give you feedback, good and bad, for your specific issues. The care ti help you ramp down your emotional responses so that you can start to think logically in ways that best benefit you.
- You will save time by not wallowing in guilt or sadness. We are compassionate but also action oriented. My job is to keep you moving forward with smart and understandable steps until you can stand on your own.
- Divorce coaches are often certified after they have gone through required training. We are professionals on par with attorneys, CPAs, or mediators.
- We will stress the need for self-care by setting up checks and balances to insulate you from being obsessed about your divorce which could lead to making choices that aren’t in your best interests.
- Divorce coaches’ work does not end when final papers are signed. Often, we will stay with you for a long period after divorce to ensure that a smooth transition takes place and can assist you with the next relationship transitioning from divorce coach to relationship coach.
- Using a divorce coach may mean you won’t need to use an attorney. Attorneys can be adversarial while divorce coaches are more collaborative. Avoiding litigation is a kinder and less expensive outcome that minimizes conflicts. In some cases, divorce coaches also have a background in family law, allowing you to take a more holistic approach using a single resource.
- Divorce breaks children, and a coach can help parents rebuild their children so they can function better. Coaches may work with both parents to create a more healing and nurturing environment when children are involved.
- Divorce coaches will help spouses preserve their dignity and give them much needed confidence that they are making the right decisions about their divorce and their futures.
- In collaborative divorces, a coach could be present for either or both sides of a divorce to facilitate a smooth process, ask the right questions, and offer good answers to ensure cooperation takes place.
- Similarly, although divorce coaches are not generally present during attorney meetings or formal mediation sessions, they can play a valuable role in helping someone beforehand or in debriefing after the fact.
What Does A Parenting Coach Do?
Parent coaching can help with a multitude of issues including transitions and changes. The child(ren) will be more of a consultation—brief eventually becoming more relationship oriented to create a safe place to discuss their concerns. The Parents goals can be broad, more person-centered, and slightly more long-term.
We will work on the languages of love to determine the best way to navigate the change everyone is experiencing. The five love languages are: words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, acts of service and receiving gifts.
Divorce and Parenting Coach bridges the gap from where you are and puts you on a track to get to where you want to be.
Parent coaching can help with:
- Transition issues (marriage, death, adoption, etc.) or familial changes
- General behavioral issues such as aggressive behavior, sibling rivalry and conflict
- Talking back and conduct problems
- Reactive attachment disorder in coordination with therapist
- Parent in recovery
- Trauma, survivors of abuse/domestic violence
- Facilitating difficult conversations with your child, like adoption, sex, etc.
- New parents
- Addictive issues such as video game/phone screen time issues, drugs or alcohol abuse
- Adaptive communication
What is Supervised Visitation?
Supervised Visitation (SV) refers to visitation between a non-custodial parent and one or more children in the presence of a third party. The third party may be referred to as a “Monitor, Observer, or Visit Supervisor”. In some cases the courts feel it is appropriate to order “Off-Site” supervised visitation to take place in the presence of a third party. It allows children to visit the non-custodial parent or “visiting” parent in a safe, positive, stress-free atmosphere. It protects children from being placed in the middle of parent’s conflicts or other problems.
The children’s needs are paramount in making any decisions regarding the need for such supervision. There are also benefits to parents. It will provide consistency with a set schedule of dates and times. The scheduling and visits can be made by the neutral party (Monitor) and there does not have to be contact before, during or after the visits. Everyone benefits from the comfortable environment.
Monitors will carefully observe the visit and record observations in a report for the court. The responsibility of the monitor is to remain neutral, neither siding with the custodial parent or visiting parent. They should be prepared to testify in a court of law.
Why not use a friend or relative rather than a professional service? At times courts will allow “non-professional” relatives or friends to provide the monitoring. Many times this does not work. Well-meaning friends or family will agree to provide the service however soon tire of the regular commitment of time and effort. It is difficult for family or friends NOT to be placed in the middle and NOT to choose sides. It places a huge burden on the relationship and then creates unnecessary strife and stress. Once neutrality is lost, then the credibility of the friend or family member is damaged. Non-Professionals can unknowingly place the children at risk by trying to remain “Friendly” and unwilling to report inappropriate behavior. They may NOT know what to observe. Putting children at risk.
Benefits of hiring a professional company provides highly trained professional monitors that have completed a rigorous curriculum in Supervised Visitation. We provide professional observations, comprehensive legal reports and will testify in court if necessary. Comfort Zones Supervised Visitation holds a membership in good standing with Supervised Visitation Network. We abide by all rules and regulations. These are the rules and regulations we abide by:
- Monitors are skilled at the methodology of observation/reporting.
- Monitors must complete 60 hours of yearly training per GAPFR requirements.
- Monitors remain neutral at all times. Rules and regulations are in place to ensure the safety and well being of all participates.
- Monitors are educated towards maintaining a positive, safe, secure atmosphere with focus on the overall care of children.
- Monitors participate in a rigorous curriculum and must pass the “Evaluated Supervised Visitation Assessment” prior to assisting clients.
- Monitors are instructed in such topics as: Domestic Violence, Sex Abuse, Physical Abuse, Neglect and Emotional Abuse, Anger, Alcohol, and Stress management, Parental Alienation and many more topics.
- Our Monitors’ recently attended courses and were certified in these topics
- CPR and first aid
- The impact of parental separation and divorce on children
- Visiting and Child reluctance
Off Site Supervised Visitation assists off-site supervised visitation by traveling to different locations. Monitors will arrive at approved location and provide monitoring, observations and written reports. Pre-approved Child-Friendly locations can consist of theaters, bounce-houses, chuck-e-cheese type places, roller skating rinks and sports areas. Appropriate places also include visiting parent’s home, local parks or libraries. Places need to be approved in advanced by administration.
- In-take Interviews are required prior to supervised visitations.
- Payment is due 7 days in advance of scheduled date.
How do I register for the Supervised Visitation Program?
Call and schedule an appointment to meet with an administrator. Complete the Supervised Visitation Forms. Bring the "8" requested items to the Intake session.
Get in Touch
Call or text (509) 387-1262
Serving clients in California, Oregon and Washington.
Please email if you have any questions.
EMAIL ME